http://www.drmomma.org/2010/09/why-spanking-is-never-okay.html
It's easy to look at your 10 month old baby; so sweet and innocent, and think that he or she will never be bad or get into any kind of trouble. I read this article today that really made me think about my future as a mother. Growing up I was always spanked when I was bad. Granted, it was not a daily occurrence and rarely ever happened...but I was spanked. I don't think it had any negative impacts on my life or relationships, but I can see how in some cases it can.
I know this is a really retarded comparison but reading this article also made me think about this. I have a dog named Rookie. If you've met him you'll know what I'm talking about when I say that he's a little "fireball." He LOVES to play and run around, barks when the doorbell rings, begs when food is around, and jumps on you when he wants attention. He is the typical hyper puppy. There are days; like yesterday, that I want to kill him. Here I am dealing with a sick baby screaming in the middle of the night, and my dog goes in his room, grabs a poopy diaper from the trash, and shreds it to pieces! I was FURIOUS! So, out of anger I picked him up, put him in the bath and spanked his bum hard! I felt horrible after. I know dogs are nothing like an actual child, but if I can't control my anger around my crazy dog then how will I control it when I'm dealing with my kids in the future? Also, if Cayman watches me do this, what is that teaching him? So, I figure if I can change the way I take care of our dog, I can definitely teach myself not to spank my children in the future.
After talking to Skyler, we've decided on a "no spanking policy!" Cayman has been through a lot and we want to make sure we are the best parents we can possibly be. I don't want him to have even one second where he doesn't feel loved, and I certainly do not want him to learn pain from us. Same goes for our dog. He can be a little turd sometimes, but we love him regardless. Last night while I stayed up with Cayman, he stayed up with me and didn't leave my side. Now he's walking around like a zombie with his ears down; because like me, he is exhausted! haha So today marks our first day of no spanking. I have a feeling ill get a better dog out of it, and a better future for our family. :)
What is your stance on spanking? Im interested to know what other peoples opinions are. :)
I do spank on occasion, if the kids are completely out of line. I sit Caleb down and tell him why he is in trouble, have daddy give the spanking, and then we hug him and say a prayer after.
ReplyDeleteYou are a good mom Beth, to be able to step back and evaluate yourself as a mother and make changes for the future, thats note worthy. Keep up the good work!
I was always spanked as a kid too. Although it didn't affect my life, I did remember it being a little traumatizing on a few occasions. Scott and I talked before we had Ava and decided on spanking, not full blown spanking where it hurts them, but rather an attention grabbing swat. I personally think some children, depending on the child, can sometimes take not being spanked as "not being disciplined" and can take advantage of that and walk all over their parents. But it all really depends on the kid. I when I worked at the preschool in Colorado, it was higher income community and I asked the kids out of curiosity, and most were not spanked, and most were very well behaved. When I worked in a different preschool here in Utah, I asked again, and this time it was a low income school, and almost all the children admitted to being spanked, and honestly...those children were TERRIBLE and several had intense anger issues and lashed out a lot. Although a neighbors child is never and never has been spanked, and she is a DEMON child! I think it just a personal choice for you baby and their personality. I think a suitable swat is ok, but full blown spanking may cause other issues.
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